Love: Poison Drug



The reason behind my silence
Is not dearth of words
Nor is it a lack of thought-
I have much to say
But I hold back
As i watch you
Destroy me
Tearing into bits
My sanity
I shed tears
Over your words
That hurt.
And bleed within
For my broken dreams.

Yet I hold back
I speak not
I repeat all I wish
In the safety of my heart
I curse you
Rage at you
Tell you off
Enumerate your faults
Show my frustration
My displeasure

Say quite loudly
How my life could have been
If only I had not
Reciprocated that
First smile of yours
If It had stopped
At a mere fluttering
Of my heart
At the slight quickening
Of my pulse
I should have stopped
Before you became
Like a drug
Like poison.

So I will hold my breath
For now.
Till my love alone
Is no longer enough
To make me live
With you.
When even without you
I can smile and breathe
Eat and live:
Till then silence it is.

But when I am
Completely broken
When my craving for you
Has had its run
When i would learn
To love this loss
This pain
When i would be
Purged of your stain
Nothing will
Keep me back.
I won’t even
Give you
A backward glance

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